Change Your Perspective

by in Relationship

“Do everything without grumbling or arguing” – Philippians 2:14

Really? Everything? Does this really apply to modern life? I mean, back when this was written there weren’t long Starbucks lines, gridlocked traffic, and impossible work deadlines. Kids weren’t in 2-3 different after-school activities and no one worried about unemployment.

In this day and age it’s hard not to complain, yet we’re told to do everything without grumbling. Why?


Have you ever been around someone who complains a lot? Notice how you feel when you’re around this person. Do you start to feel down, or encouraged? It seems as though complaining can be contagious. I don’t know about you, but if I’m around someone who is in a bad mood for too long, I either get in a bad mood myself, or I want to get away from them.

Generally, people who do things and complain bring others “down” around them. It’s not fun or enjoyable being around people who grumble or argue.

Being Positive

But, there’s a twist. Notice how people who are upbeat, positive and see the “silver lining” are told they’re not in reality! They can be facing the worst situations, yet they are always positive and don’t seem to focus on the negative. Why is it that we look at them as weird?!

Now, I’m not talking about people who are in denial, or who have their head in the sand. I’m talking about people who acknowledge reality, but who keep a positive outlook and keep shining like the stars.

It’s a choice to be positive and it’s a choice to do things without grumbling or arguing. Long Starbucks line? Choose to be thankful you can afford the drink. Sitting in frustrating traffic? Choose to be thankful you have a car and the ability to drive. Stressed because of work deadlines? Choose to be thankful you have a job.

Feel chaotic with your kid’s after-school schedules? Choose to be thankful your children are healthy enough to engage in these activities. Dealing with unemployment? Choose to be thankful for this time God can lead you in a new direction and speak to you about something He wants to tell you.

Change your Perspective

If you focus on what’s wrong, then that’s all you’ll see. If you focus on what’s right, even in the face of something going wrong, that’s what you’ll find as well.

The purpose of doing everything without grumbling or arguing is so we can give all the glory to God. He’s providing everything to us anyway, how rude of us to complain about something He’s given us, right? And, when we give that honor to God, He blesses us even more – what a great set up!

Changing this line of thinking does not happen overnight. Don’t expect to be perfect at this. You are human! It’s going to be natural to complain and argue about things. The goal here is progress and catching yourself. If you find that you’ve had a grumbling attitude, reframe it, ask for forgiveness, and do better next time. Rather, make it a goal for praise and thankfulness to be contagious.

About the Author:

Tamara Wilhelm MA, LMHC, LCAC is a therapist at Imagine Hope Counseling Group.

Imagine Hope Counseling Group provides marriage, couples, individual and family counseling for adults, children and adolescents. Imagine Hope is based out of Indianapolis, Indiana. Imagine Hope’s desire is to inspire hope for life and relationships, understanding that Hope is one of the most important things a person needs in order to keep pressing on when life gets tough. Tamara has specialized experience in helping others in the areas of depression, anxiety, infidelity, communication, addictions and self-esteem. Having a passion for guiding people towards healthy, fulfilling relationships is Imagine Hope’s mission.

To learn more about Imagine Hope please visit or read our blog at


Tamara Wilhelm is a therapist at Imagine Hope Counseling Group and specializes in helping others in the areas of depression, anxiety, infidelity, communication, addictions and self-esteem.

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