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Christian Insights
Top 10 Ways to "Bear Market Proof" Your Relationships
By Pat Swan, M.S.
Do you want to keep your intimate relationships in a "Bull Market,"
and out of a "Bear Market"?
We hear stories daily about individuals or
organizations that thrive during the bull market, slip in the bear
market when stocks drop, and end up bankrupt. Others suffer a loss,
but plan for a turnaround and don’t experience devastation.
How do they weather the bear market? They manage
their portfolio wisely.
Close, personal relationships can follow a similar
path. Many start out
in a bull market, slide into a bear market, and
then go bankrupt. Like investors, you can weather your relationship
ups and downs if you manage your relationship portfolio wisely.
Apply these ten rules of wise investing and avoid relationship
bankruptcy.
1.LIST ASSETS AND LIABILITIES
If you want great relationships, first know who
you are and what you want. What are your values, beliefs. If you do
not know what you believe, you may get off track.
2.DETERMINE GOALS.
Where are you and where do you want to go? What
are your personal and relational goals now, and in the future? If
you do not know what you want over the long term, you may get off
track.
3.READ THE PROSPECTUS.
4.DECIDE WHICH INVESTMENT BEST FITS YOUR GOALS.
With investments you consider whether you want
short term, long term, high risk, or low risk investments. You
decide whether you can reach your goals with stocks, mutual funds,
or money market accounts.
What do you need, want, and require in a close
relationship? What kind of relationships will support your life
goals? Imagine you love the country and want a cabin in the woods
some day. You invite loss of your dreams if you continue to invest
emotionally in someone who loves the city lights and hates bugs!
Where will you find compatible relationships or
life partner who shares your wishes, hopes and dreams? Probably not
in the local bar, unless that is your life goal. Do what you love to
do, and find friendships in those places.
5. DON’T THROW GOOD MONEY AFTER BAD.
If it drops 8% or more sell.
If you are single, don’t get hooked into a
relationship that is not working. Don’t continue to invest emotional
capital and stay for convenience. I often see individuals who
complain about how unfulfilling their relationship feels. He has
kids from a prior marriage. She can’t stand them. Or, she wants a
child someday. He insists he will never have children. They fight
over differences, but they insist on trying to make it work. Redo
steps one and two. Diversify.
If you are married, especially if you have
children, the relationship becomes more than one investment. It
becomes a complete portfolio. Identify and appreciate the
investments that bring in returns. Identify asset drains and find
solutions. Don’t stick your head in the sand and hope your portfolio
will fix itself. Don’t wait until you lose all your assets. If you
need help, get it.
6.START EARLY.
To build a successful relationship portfolio,
begin to invest emotional capital immediately.
7.INVEST OFTEN.
Continue daily. Invest in relationship skills
education. Make frequent emotional investments including affection,
support, fun and laughter. Don’t just invest when the market is up
and things go well. Invest when the market slips a bit, when the
relationship feels distant, or one of you experiences a bad day.
8. STICK WITH SOLID INVESTMENTS OVER THE LONG
HAUL.
If you take the time to choose a life partner
wisely, your relationship portfolio should bring in returns and
prove solid over the long haul. You will choose a life partner who
shares your values, hopes and dreams. You will not feel pressure to
compromise your values or desires or spend hours fighting over
deal-breakers.
9.WATCH YOUR PORTFOLIO AND MAKE ADJUSTMENTS WHEN
NEEDED.
Keep an eye on your portfolio and make adjustments
when needed.
10.DON’T GET DISTRACTED BY NEW OPTIONS THAT
PROMISE SHORT-TERM REWARDS.
Learn to weather the ups and downs and stick with
a good investment for the long-term.
You lose vast amounts of emotional and financial
capital when you do not choose wisely in the first place.
You may not control the markets. But you can
manage your personal and financial investments. Apply these five
rules and create a strong relationship portfolio that pays dividends
in a "Bull Market" and in a "Bear Market."
About the Author
© Pat Swan, M.S., Life and Relationship Coach,
http://www.RelationshipSkillville.com . Pat is a speaker, coach,
and author of "Watch Out! Your Relationships Can Be Hazardous to
Your Health," available at
http://www.StopRelationshipStress.com. Stop relationship stress
and discover secret remedies for better health. Mailto:pat@patswan.com
. PH: 262-642-5706.
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